Ha! We thought this title might catch your attention. Now that we have it, let us explain what we’re talking about.
A week ago, inspired by the successful public campaign demanding our Town Council pass a resolution supporting a Constitutional Amendment to invalidate the US Supreme Court ruling known as Citizens United v. FEC, we came before the Council with a statement of our own.
Here it is in it’s entirety:
· Good evening. I’m Mr. Schaeffer from Crestview Lane. And I blog at othersideofbrunswick.blogspot.com.
· One of the things that struck me about the action you recently took on Citizens United is that for years we’ve been told that you can’t do anything about the school budget, but yet you can press for an amendment to the US Constitution! How curious and selective your powers are.
· Could I please have a show of hands for how many of you know that Justice Thomas wrote the majority opinion for Citizens United? (let the record show no hands were raised.)
· And how many know that the opinion is 86 pages long in pdf form? (let the record show no hands were raised; but one councilor gave us a knowing nod.)
· And a show of hands for how many of you read the opinion before deciding which way to vote? (let the record show no hands were raised.)
· That’s interesting, because it was written by Justice Kennedy, and it’s 57 pages long in pdf form.
· As long as you’ve decided to expand your jurisdiction into national political activism, I think it’s only fair you tell us how high the bar is for passing a resolution on something my friends and I support.
- How many citizens must speak at Council meetings, and how many signatures on a petition are the magic numbers? Is it 5 and 200, or 6 and 500, or just what?
- It would be ever so much easier for the rest of us if you codified the numbers in the rules of council order.
· Some of my ideas are as follows:
- The Council should pass a resolution endorsing a Constitutional Amendment to eliminate the Federal Income Tax. As long as meddling, busy-bodying, and council activism in somebody else’s business is acceptable, why not?
- How about an amendment to make Barack Obama President for Life? Is there any doubt the population of Brunswick would support this in at least the numbers they supported the Citizens United petition?
- And then an amendment to provide that labor unions and various associations are not entitled to the entirety of protections or rights of natural persons, specifically so that expenditure of their money to influence elections is not a form of constitutionally protected speech.
- Brunswick needs a buttle law to add to the bottle law. This would call for a $2 a pack deposit on cigarette butts, or 10 cents each. Imagine how this might clean up our streets, sidewalks, and gutters.
- We need a Constitutional Amendment to stop George Soros from spending his ill-gotten billions infiltrating American society with his collectivist agenda.
· I’d like to cite some language from the town charter, Section 101. - Incorporation. The inhabitants of the Town of Brunswick shall continue to be a municipal corporation called the Town of Brunswick, Maine.
· From Section 102. – Powers of the town.
- (a) The town shall have, exercise and enjoy all the rights, immunities, powers and privileges of municipal corporations incorporated under the laws of the State of Maine. It shall be subject to all the duties, liabilities and obligations provided for herein, or otherwise pertaining to or incumbent upon such municipal corporations.
- (b) The town may enact by-laws, regulations and ordinances consistent with the Constitution and laws of the State of Maine and establish penalties for the breach thereof as provided by the laws of the State of Maine.
· I note that at the 22 January council meeting this year, Councilor Favreau moved, and Councilor Richardson seconded a motion to affirm support for hiring a lobbying team. The motion carried 8 to 0. So in other words, the corporation that is Brunswick is spending money on political free speech, as if it was a ‘natural person.’ Odd coincidence, that. But I suppose such irony is lost on most of you and the town.
· Thanks for this chance to speak. And you can find my blog at othersideofbrunswick.blogspot.com.
It took all of 4 or 5 minutes to deliver our remarks. Each time we asked for a show of hands, all councilors in attendance sat on their hands. This may have been because they could not answer in the affirmative, or because they refuse as a matter of principle to respond to public questions, which would put them on the record for their stance.
Except for one councilor, who, we suppose, wanted to earn our respect for having studied the decision. Just like that, our trap snapped shut. The councilor nodded at us that he knew the decision was 86 pages long, except it wasn’t. It was, as you read above, 57 pages long.
Oops! And so we are left wondering where our councilors come down on major federal issues of the day, which, of course, is their greatest responsibility.
Given the elective bias here in the Town of Perfect, we submit this graphic to provide inspiration for a new poster that tells the story of Brunswick.
You may think we’re being absurd, and so did we when we came up with the gambit for opening this post. But try googling ‘Obama President for Life’ and see what you get for results. Then tell us we’re being absurd.
If you do, it’s you who are being absurd, not us.
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