Hello, out there, Other Side readers! Did you have a nice two year snooze, since you didn't have our musings to stimulate you to a higher level of consciousness? And keep you awake and chuckling? Or fuming?
Turns out it's exactly two years and four days since we last posted. There are at least two reasons for that.
First, eventually we tire of following local issues, or more accurately, depressed from the efforts. We've posted 1,370 times, according to Blogger, since we launched Other Side, which averages out to something like 100 per year since we began in 2009, even considering we haven't done so in two years. That's a pretty active record, though admittedly, it was front loaded.
Second, we've focused recently on loftier issues of broader national interest in our thinking and writing. In the last two years or so, we've been having our "columns" published on a national newsletter that distributes to roughly 30,000 readers, and who knows how many of their friends and acquaintances to whom they forward the newsletters. The items we've published that way are of a more serious, thoughtful type, and usually take our staff a few days to compose and review. Though our genetic tendency towards sarcasm and the like is always nearby.
That's just the opposite of the mode Other Side operated in, which was much more a spur of the moment post, and sometimes two a day, just depending on how things rolled and how we reacted to them. We have no editor here, except Poppy, and we pretty much have him under our thumb....which isn't much of a challenge.
We may decide to release some of out items published in the newsletter here. If nothing else, that's an easy way to up the activity level and related traffic counts.
Third, we've hit the "Big 80" this year, and realistically speaking, while our silliness and wittiness are still in good form, our energies for dedicated attention to town matters and keeping Other Side fresh have tailed off in favor of more naps and reading.
Sometimes, as you can imagine, lightning strikes....or a lazy spark, whatever the case may be, that reignites the fires of desire for posting. And this year's news from the House of Sartoris has done just that.
We checked the archives, and the two most recent times we posted on the subject are these:
https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/4627412041711715960/2655419498438558225
https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/4627412041711715960/8821931461375836303
The most relevant, though, may be this one:
https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/4627412041711715960/5693855906123768909
whose subject is Ambitions of the House of Sartoris, which is what we will briefly address here.
(Ed note: please excuse visuals in the items above that have "been disappeared" or cancelled by processes beyond our control.)
Many of you likely know that since our post in 2014, Sartoris, who we referred to as JP2 in the past, has been busy earning a law degree, and eventually taking a position in the Kennebec County DA's Office in Augusta.
Best we can tell, she also attended the Soros Correspondence School of Prosecutorial Leniency for a number of years. Which makes her a classmate of George Gascon, Chesa Boudin, Alvin Bragg, Kim Foxx, respectively DA's in Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York, and Chicago, where their efforts have been hugely successful, and wildly popular with residents and business owners. In some places, the safer environments have seen products literally "flying off the shelfs" as more and more residents avail themselves of the offerings in local establishments. As a Diplomate of the Soros School, Jackie joins a growing army of progressive and benevolent crime fighters, who place law breakers ahead of public safety.
We've even heard she has espoused the closure of "Women's" Prisons in the past, believing that women should not be imprisoned. How she would reword this sentence in the woke era we can only imagine, but you get the drift.
Soros, the founder of the correspondence school, was so impressed by Sartoris' commitment to his cause, that he invested $300,000 in her campaign for Cumberland County (Maine) District Attorney. At least as reported in Portland media sources.
Since tuition at the Soros School is free gratis, that's quite a graduation present he gave to what we would have thought was a little known candidate in the backwater state of Maine. Nothing, it seems, is beyond the reach of Soros ideology and influence buying. We shouldn't ignore the possibility that Jackie sought him and his shekels out with a heartfelt letter of promise to do his prosecutorial bidding.
We assume she's spending it all on her campaigns, though rules for reporting on such things seem to be pretty lax; it's not unheard of in higher circles to hear of pols retiring with sizable balances in their "campaign war chest."
We'll sign off with a few related comments. First, we'll no longer refer to our subject as Jackie Piranha, like we did in the past. Some might suggest Jackie Goldfish, or Jackie Guppy, might be more appropriate. Bluefish is another choice.....that only some will fathom.
At the moment, we think the most appropriate, and accurate cognomen for her is Jackie Sartoris-Soros, in keeping with modern day naming fashions.
We doubt that's how her name will appear on the November ballot. In any case, we suggest you vote for a write in candidate for the Cumberland County DA.
We're going with George Soros himself, since he is largely responsible for what will show on the printed ballot. And even more responsible for the "policies" she will implement.
Just so there are no mistakes, we'll spell it out plainly so you can do the same:
G E O R G E S O R O S
Copy it on a little post-it note so you have it handy when you fill out your ballot.
We don't know how many Walgreens and CVS Stores there are in our County, but they should make sure their surveillance cameras are working and up to the new shopping "methods" that may become more common in our area. Who knows where it will go from there.
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