Friday, December 2, 2011

Friday Frivolities, Part Deux

You can file this addendum in the stuff file cabinet, under PSMIS.

That stands for “Please, Someone, Make It Stop!”  And put it in the Bowdoin College sub-folder.

Some of you know that we publish here as ‘P. C. Poppycock.’  P. C., as it turns out, are this reporter’s real first initials.  They also stand for politically correct, a pox upon our land.  Poppycock means nonsense, and its synonyms include:

babble, balderdash, baloney, bull*, bunk, drivel, empty talk, foolery, foolishness, gibberish, hogwash, hooey, hot air, jive, malarkey, mumbo jumbo, palaver, prattle, rubbish, silliness, trash.

Hence our nom-de-plume is part eponymous and part pseudonymous.

P. C. Poppycock is exactly what came to mind as we glanced at today’s Bowdoin Orient, the campus student newspaper.  Page 1 features an article titled Sexual assault allegations stir Colby, no doubt published with considerable glee by Orient staff.

There are some telling, to say the least, pronouncements by Colby officials in the article (emphasis ours):

The allegations have sparked dialogue across Colby's campus. Colby President William Adams wrote to the student body in an email, "These are deeply troubling allegations that have far-reaching impacts on our community. And I know we are all concerned about whether the campus climate encourages or excuses behaviors that are antithetical to our community values."

Antithetical to our community values??? It takes the unmitigated gall to say this that only a modern day liberal academic could possess. As anyone familiar with campus culture these days knows, college community values are sex any time, all the time, with anyone, no questions asked, no gooey relationships needed. Preferably with copious amounts of 'substances' as lubrication.

And then there’s this:

The dialogue continued at a large event held in Colby's Page Commons on November 15. A notice from Colby's Vice President of Student Affairs and Dean of Students James Terhune explained that the purpose of the event was exploring "how Colby deals with sexual misconduct."

Exploring how you deal with sexual misconduct? What is this, a safari?  Or a first in history occurrence?  Pure academic psycho-babble that fully exhibits why we have the culture we do; so called leaders are at the bleeding edge of societal dumbing down through language abuse heaped on top of all the other forms of intellectual abuse present on our campuses.

Both, we submit, are fine examples of P. C. Poppycock.  But that’s just us, although we have little choice in who to be.

As a second addendum candidate, we noted a Security Report in the Orient that perfectly illustrates, in our opinion, the thoughts we expressed on college students in our post earlier today.  Unfortunately, we can’t find it on the web version of the paper.  If we did, it would help you end your day with a laugh followed by a moment of somber reflection.

Since we can’t give you the whole article, we’ll just offer a few prize-winners; keep in mind these are items officially reported to and by the Bowdoin Office of Safety and Security:

- An intoxicated student vandalized the paper towel and soap dispensers in a Smith Union men’s room.

- A student was escorted to Parkview Adventist Medical Center after he slipped on a wet floor in Coles Tower and cut his eyebrow.  (Couldn’t he had waited until the next day to trim his eyebrow?)

- A student at Stowe Inn reported being disturbed by noise from a nearby room.

Surely there’s a cause for protest or cries for social injustice somewhere in these reports.

One thing’s for sure; this ain’t your father’s college campus. 

And you know what?  It ain’t mine either. 

We conclude with a burning question: the next time our grandkids visit, can we call the Brunswick ‘campus’ police to report being “disturbed by noise from a nearby room?”


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