Friday, May 17, 2013

The Plunger on the Bus Goes Up and Down, Up and Down, Up and Down…

File this post under:

Good Professor Duhovnikoff Wants You For the Brunswick Clueless Bus Trip To Augusta

We say that, of course, because the gesture, and the gesture alone, is reminiscent of the classic Uncle Sam poster from the World War II era.

And trust us; this is, in fact, a photo of the Professor and his friends, shown on his Facebook page.  (Don’t you just love social media?)

(We ended up using “up and down, up and down, up and down” in the post title because we couldn’t figure out how to ‘spell’ the sound a plunger makes when you pump it up and down.)

As you can see, the Professor is clearly plunging himself into the organizing task with everything he’s got.  He’s hoping to unclog the money pipe between Augusta and Brunswick.  But there’s a risk; you never know what you’re going to pull back up on the backstroke.

We’re not sure if the Professor is just a wild and crazy guy, or is forming a Boy George and the Culture Connection cover band.  On the other hand, this could be he and his fellow bus riders rehearsing their act for Tuesday’s trip to Augusta.

If it is, we’ve got to say that based on our experience in the Capitol, we think the parasols may be a bit over the top.  And while the posies atop the plunger bring out the color in the Professor’s eyes, the black nail polish is a distraction.  The first rule of theater costuming, Professor, is to keep the focal points to a minimum.  Otherwise, they aren’t focal points.

We’re thinking the Professor might be taken more seriously by elected officials in Augusta if he goes with headwear more like this:

There’s still plenty of time to have a local milliner craft a likeness of the Maine Statehouse with a Brunswick School Bus posed in front.

If he thinks that’s too sedate, he can always go for a bit more flash by taking inspiration from these political activists strutting their grievances:

Note how their ensembles are fully coordinated to maximize the optics, as they call it these days.  The look is ever so Facebook!

We suppose there’s a chance the Professor and his fellow bus-riders, steeped as they are in old New England traditions, might actually prefer something more refined for a visit to the ruling elite, in which case we would suggest this lovely creation, or something similarly reserved, to ensure all with whom they meet take them seriously:


By the way, to those riding along on Tuesday, make sure you’ve got some spending cash with you.  We understand the School Department charges $300 to rent the bus and a driver, though we’re a bit perplexed as to how they can do this on a busy school morning. Is it possible we have more buses and drivers than we actually need?

Anyway, for those of you troubled by math, if there are 10 of you riding along, your share will be $30 a person.  We don’t expect NRA members, and the others we’ve invited, to chip in, since they aren’t really ‘fellow travelers.’  And more than likely, they feel they’re already paying more than their ‘fair share’ for the bus.

One last thing; if the Professor and his team meet with some resistance when they arrive in the seat of our government, they can always say ‘speak to the plunger, ‘cause the face ain’t listening.’


(Ed. note: a special Other Side shout-out to Fred Horch, who has single-handedly doubled the daily traffic (with several hours still to go) on our humble reporting service.  Don’t you just love social media?)

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